The Patience Of Our Patients.

In the realm of marriage and family therapy, the words we choose matter. The terms "patient" and "client" may seem like mere semantics, but they carry distinct connotations that can profoundly impact the therapeutic process. When I engage with couples who are embarking on a journey of emotional healing and growth through Emotionally Focused Therapy, I prefer to refer to them as "clients" rather than "patients." Why, you ask? Well, it all comes down to the essence of the therapeutic relationship. The term "patient" implies a passive role, suggesting that one is seeking a cure or remedy for an ailment. In contrast, "client" embodies a more active and collaborative stance, one that emphasizes the client's agency in their own healing journey. When couples enter therapy, they bring with them unique stories, experiences, and emotions that deserve to be acknowledged and respected. By referring to them as clients, we honor their autonomy and validate their active participation in the therapeutic process. Now, let's talk about patience. This past Friday I was in Brooklyn, NY when the deluge started. It didn’t just rain. It was a biblical downpour. In fact, a record-breaking 8 inches of rain fell, overwhelming the streets, sidewalks and subways. Getting around the city required a boatload of patience. Eventually we executed our modified plans and had a great day. We had to set aside the urgent feeling of doing-all-the-things, and enjoy being able to do whatever life allowed on that day in the swamp. Couples who take the courageous step of seeking therapy often carry with them a sense of urgency, a desire for quick fixes and immediate solutions to their relational struggles. However, the art of emotional healing is a delicate and intricate process that cannot be rushed. It requires time, dedication, and, most importantly, patience. Patience with oneself, as individuals confront their own vulnerabilities and emotional wounds, and patience with their partner as they navigate the complexities of the relationship. EFT reminds us that deep, lasting change takes time, and the journey towards a healthier and more secure connection is a worthwhile one. It's a journey where patience becomes not just a virtue but a necessity, an integral part of the path towards emotional healing and lasting love. Now, on with this week’s Ohio EFT Newsletter:

Manhattan Is Awash In Empty Therapist Offices. by Arlane Quinlan on October 2nd, 2023 Speaking of NYC, a survey by the platform Alma, which helps therapists run their businesses, found that three-quarters of respondents in New York State are still fully remote. Nationally, almost a third of the members of the American Psychological Association said they see all their patients remotely, according to the APA’s latest survey. The real estate industry website Curbed is reporting on what this shift is doing to therapy office space in major metropolitan areas like Manhattan. I’d love to see a similar report about office space here in Ohio. What are you seeing? Why Is Anxiety Rising? by Andy Kessler on October 2nd, 2023 According to this Wall Street Journal article, fears of extinction, Covid, socializing and a second Trump term are all at play. Ohio EFT’s Monthly Google Meet Video Call - Friday October 27th @ 9:00am (EST) by Ohio EFT on October 2nd, 2023 Join us at 9:00am Friday, October 27th, for our continuing discussion about Emotionally Focused Therapy. We’re continuing with Stage 1 this month, highlighting Step 3. I’ll have the link in our next newsletter.

FREE Online Training: Going Into The Fire: Using EFT With Military Families. by PESI on October 2nd, 2023 Helping military and veteran families doesn't have to be a daunting, overwhelming task. In fact, with a clear roadmap and the right tools, you can transform trauma into growth and create positive change in the midst of reactivity and fear! On November 6th & 7th the platform PESI is offering a free webinar with George Faller, LMFT about using EFT with military families. Learn how EFT can be used to befriend clients' defensive strategies and incorporate powerful, moment-by-moment, evidence-based techniques to keep focus in session. He, She, They: The Pronoun Debate Will Likely Land At The Supreme Court. by Kimberly Wehle on October 2nd, 2023 Politico does a deep dive into the emerging questions about whether public school children have a right to choose names and pronouns affirming their gender identity, or whether parents’ right to manage the upbringing of their children overrides it. Hint: the trend doesn’t look good for transgender kids. Anger Overwhelms Our Thinking Brain. Here’s How To Bring It Back Online. by Christopher W.T. Miller on October 2nd, 2023 When we are angry, our emotional brain goes into overdrive, and we act first rather than think first. The trick to navigate this is to bring our thinking brains back in charge. Dr. Miller explains exactly what’s going on in our heads when we’re angry in this Washington Post article.

Starting Soon: New Central Ohio EFT Consultation Group. by RCOhio on October 2nd, 2023 Dr. Allison Fagan is forming a group for central Ohio EFT couples’ therapists. The plan is to meet in person for 90 minutes beginning this fall. A six month commitment is required. $45 per session for a total cost of $270. The sessions will include time for deep-dive consultation and general discussion. Enrollment will be limited to 6 professionals. Completion of an EFT Externship or semester-long graduate class in EFT is required for participation. Dr. Fagan says that if there is enough interest, they will do a Zoom group. Find out more about this group at the Relationship Counseling of Ohio website. Your Friend Is Struggling? Maybe Don’t Ask for Details. by Samantha Boardman on October 2nd, 2023 A therapist asks: Are endless discussions about our problems making us feel even worse? This WSJ article is aimed at non-therapists, but makes some great points about the fact that endless discussions about our problems can inadvertently amplify distress. Non-Sleep Deep Rest Tracks. by Recommendo on October 2nd, 2023 Non-Sleep Deep Rest (NSDR), also known as yoga nidra, induces a state of deep relaxation while maintaining consciousness. If you're unable to take a 15-minute nap when you're tired, you might find that one of these free 9-minute NSDR tracks has a similar effect. The guided breathing techniques help to slow down your heart rate, and the body scans can redirect your focus from external visual information to a sensation of pure rest.

Got something you’d like to share for an upcoming newsletter? Send it to chris@ohioeft.com

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